4 Ways to Overcome Insecurities in a Relationship

By Viroon on 02 May 2020

Senior Creative Editor

Passionate about fashion, beauty and lifestyle. Junk Food Junkie | When she’s not writing, you can find her at the pantry munching on snacks.

Uncertainties and negativities in relationships can cause anyone to feel insecure. Feeling insecure in your relationship can be really painful and upsetting. It can manifest itself in all kinds of ways. You might feel like your partner is about to break up with you all the time. You might have trouble trusting them to not cheat on you.

Scroll on to see how you can overcome it!

#1 Take stock of your value

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Insecurities are tough to get rid of. Annoying and really hard to banish. Take stock of your valuable traits instead of focusing on what you feel you are lacking of. Your thoughts could be your relationship’s best friend or worst enemy. Think about the traits you have as a person—you may be kind, trustworthy and funny. These are traits most people value in a partner. Focus on what you offer instead of what you feel you lack; this will change your perspective. If the other person doesn’t appreciate what you have to offer, that’s his or her loss.

#2 Build your self-esteem

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Building your self-esteem is the only way to get rid of your insecurities (or at least, keep them at bay.) Learn to silence your inner critic and practise self-compassion, and retrain yourself to focus on the aspects of yourself you like instead of the ones you don’t like. Start by booking yourself a luxury spa day, start exercising or doing something you love.

#3 Keep your independence

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A healthy relationship is comprised of two healthy people. Becoming overly attached in a relationship can lead to poor boundaries and a diffuse sense of your own needs. Maintaining your sense of self-identity and taking care of your needs for personal well-being are the keys to keeping a healthy balance in a relationship. Doing things on your own can help boost your confidence and remind yourself that you still have a life outside of your romantic relationship. So go ahead and make time for yourself!

#4 Trust in yourself

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Trust is the key to happy, healthy relationships. Feeling secure in a relationship depends on trusting the other person but, more importantly, on learning to trust yourself. Trust yourself not to hide your feelings and to make sure your needs are met. Trust yourself to know that if the relationship isn’t working, you will be able to leave and still be a wholly functioning individual. It's also important to trust your instincts. If your partner has never given you a reason to distrust them, then don’t.

It's important to remember that no one is perfect—we all come with some baggage. The best thing you can do is effectively communicate with your partner.

Insecurities are bound to surface from time to time in even the most stable relationships. You can’t control your partner’s emotions, but you can be the most supportive, loving version of yourself possible.