At 17, She Gave Birth To Her First Child While Everyone Else Were Taking Their 'O' Levels

It was an accident. But one that nobody regretted.

While everyone around her was preparing to take their 'N' and 'O' levels, she was getting ready for something bigger: giving birth to her first child.

When she was 17, Mabelene Chua (now 22), experienced waves of nausea during her daily commute. Besides this, she would also get occasional almost-blackouts when she's among crowds. She didn't think much of these though, until she noticed that she missed her period for over two months. For someone with a regular menstrual cycle, she knew something was amiss.

Mabelene's suspicions were proven right when the pregnancy kit results came back positive. A visit to the private clinic confirmed this too.

The first person I told was my husband and he seems pretty happy over it and told me that he'll do whatever it takes to support us.

Breaking the news to her parents

Having been raised in a traditional Chinese family and at a young age of 17, Mabelene was afraid of how her parents would react. When she finally broke the news to them, they were worried and angry but after hearing that Ken (her then boyfriend and now husband) would take full responsibility, they were relieved.

The wedding bells rang shortly after and the two walked down the aisle. But of course, that's when the real challenge began.

Welcoming their first child

After 7 long hours in the operating theatre where she went through natural birth with epidural (anaesthesia), Mabelene and Ken welcomed Phoebe Grace, their first child. Weighing just 2.6KG at the time of birth, Mabelene gushed at how tiny she was.

When asked about how she felt when she saw her daughter, Mabelene expressed that she was "scared and didn't feel the bond" despite carrying her in her womb for nine months. In fact, Mabelene was "afraid to carry her as she was so fragile and small in size."

But things changed when she brought her home.

"The first week with Phoebe in my life was difficult. I recall going through very bad baby blues and I'd cry and panic each time I wake up and don't see her by my side. I became very obsessed with having her around me and would always make sure she's around me."

It went on for some time and being a first-time dad, Ken couldn't understand what exactly Mabelene was thinking but "he always tries his best". Along the way, there were also many disagreements on how they want to bring up Phoebe but they would eventually find a common ground and make things better.

Phoebe's presence brought great joy to Mabelene and Ken and that's when they decided to try for a second child but things didn't turn out the way they wanted it to.

When asked about her second child, Mabelene shared:

My second daughter’s name was Pearl Elise.

During my fifth month check-up, doctors discovered a couple of holes in Pearl's head. This wasn't normal and they first thought it's a sign for down syndrome but after running through some tests, they found out it was chromosome abnormalities and it would only mean that her overall health, speech and learning abilities would be affected by 0-15%; a figure that wasn't considered serious from a medical perspective.

This time, the doctors found that there were water accumulating inside her head and said that she would have to undergo surgery when she's born.

But things went south in my 35th week of expecting her. She was very still inside me and I can't feel any form of movement at all. I went straight to the A&E department at KK Hospital and after the doctors ran some checks, I was told that her heart wasn't beating anymore. I then went through labour induction and welcomed her into this world as a stillborn.

The nurses gave me a few hours to hold onto her when she was out to say goodbye.

Life after Pearl, her second child

Though Mabelene's second pregnancy didn't turn out the way she wanted it to, they wanted to complete their family with another child and so they did. This time, it's a boy and they named him Pierre Lucian.

Unlike her first and second labour experience, she went through natural birth without any anesthesia and according to Mabelene, "the contractions hurts like hell and there isn't any 'rest time' before the next contraction hit".

"The pushing part (delivery) still scares me till today. At that moment, I felt like the lower part of my body was burning and tearing apart. The doctors didn't perform any episiotomy so I had to really push my baby out on my own."

Her motherhood journey

"Looking back, I do not have any regrets about becoming a mother. Even if it means I have to sacrifice my freedom, time and studies for my children it is okay. I know that I'd eventually come to this stage one day and I'm just a step ahead of the others so that's okay."

Mabelene is now staying in a government rental flat with her husband and two children. Though times are trying, they are happy are both working hard for their family.

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Photos: Mabelene Chua

Text by: GirlStyle SG

Text by: Girlstyle SG